Teach Yourself
Having been born, we should know how to teach ourselves. I myself don’t see the need for anyone to teach me at all. I can do everything even though I am completely illiterate. Everything can be observed and then used to teach oneself.
Even with cleaning, I didn’t see anyone come to teach me. Father didn’t teach me, mother didn’t teach me. I taught myself. Since the time I was a child living in Nakhon Chai Si, after eating, when collecting the rice pot and bowls to wash, I would wash both the outside and the inside. I washed until
everything was spotless. When mopping the house, I would mop it clean, both on top of the stairs and under the stairs. My older siblings would say, “Why don’t you just wash only the side that’s used?” or “Why don’t you mop only on top of the stairs?” I would tell them, “I don’t know either. I just want to mop my way like this. I want to mop it all clean.” It taught me to wash it clean, both outside and inside.
It was the same when I was living at Khun Nai Liab’s house. When wiping tables and chairs, I would wipe both the top and bottom until they were clean, not leaving any dust at all. My mind was focused on loving cleanliness, making everything clean. I couldn’t stand seeing anything dirty. I would keep an eye on it, and whenever I was free, I would do it immediately.
Like one day, I noticed moss growing in the corner of the stairs. I saw it and kept an eye on it. As soon as I was free, I immediately scrubbed it clean. I did this until there was nothing left to do. That’s why they trusted me a lot.
It was the same when I went to live with Khun Yai Thongsuk at Wat Paknam. I arranged everything – rice containers, cabinets, beds – to be clean and tidy. When I entered the workshop to practice Vijja, they chose the oldest bed for me, full of bedbugs, with an old, torn, and dirty mosquito net. But I didn’t mind. As long as I got to sit and practice Dhamma, I was satisfied.
When bitten by bedbugs and feeling a sharp pain, I would catch them and put them in a spittoon, covering it with paper. In the morning, I would release them. I kept cleaning like this until everything around me was clean. The bed was clean, and the old mosquito net was as clean as it could be.
From a young age, I have always been like this – loving cleanliness and orderliness. What should be, what shouldn’t be, what belongs where, where it should be placed – I taught myself all of this. Even what time I should do what, when the time comes, I would do it systematically, in an orderly manner. I divided my time well. When I was at Wat Paknam, I taught myself about discipline in all matters very well.
Later on, when I practiced meditation and could recollect my past lives, I sat and concentrated to see why I was like this. I realized that I could teach myself because I had practiced a lot of meditation in my previous lives. The merit from practicing meditation gave rise to the wisdom to teach myself. Therefore, we must be diligent in practicing meditation a lot, so that we can teach ourselves.
November 6, 1980
